Rebel with a Cause

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Dress by Forever 21 Plus

 

While on vacation in New Orleans a couple of weeks ago, I got a Tarot card reading. I agreed with the readers’ insights (I had two, because my life is complicated and both felt compelled to interpret my cards) until one went off script and gave me fashion advice.

 

 

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"I think you are a very beautiful girl, but you shouldn't wear a dress with a busy print, it makes you look bigger." Normally, I would let this slide, but three minutes prior she told to “be more assertive,” "believe in myself," and "not be a door mat.” It was only right I put her advice to the test. I looked her in the eye and said "I appreciate the advice, but I wear what I like. Not what ‘people’ think is acceptable." She respected that. I continued, "I'm big and everybody out here knows it. There’s nothing wrong with appearing bigger. My fashion motto is ‘just do it’.” 

 

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How's that for being assertive and being not being a doormat?

 

I walked away proud of my busy dress, because it goes against society. I decided to wear it in spite of the “big girl fashion rules.” I felt like a rebel.

 

 

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I enjoyed my Tarot readings, so I’m not bashing the reader. On your journey to self-discovery and self-love, you’ll come up against society’s ideas about how you dress and look. Everyone won’t love the bolder, more empowered you, but don’t let their doubts derail you. As long as you are not killing or hurting yourself, you right girl!!!


Until next time, wear whatever makes you feel good.

 

 

A Conversation about my Breast

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A few weeks ago I attended the Flying Farms Annual Charity event hosted by Abercrombie and Fitch in Columbus.

Towards the end of the event, after the drinks started to flow, the food had been served, I found myself alone at a table watching the live band play. I was approached by a woman, and before I knew it we were engaged in a very deep conversation about my breast.

Ok, now I know what you are thinking, but it was nothing like that. Turns out she is Patty Beigal the Senior VP of the International Division of Victoria Secret. See, totally legit!

The topic of my breast came up in the conversation after she asked me if I shopped at Victoria Secret and my response was "Nope!". She asked "why?".

Now this is where all of you popped into my mind, and I had to speak on behalf of you. So, I cleared my throat and voiced my opinion, and I'm assuming some of yours as well. I told her when its time for me to go bra shopping I tend to go to the first place that pop into my head: Torrid, Lane Bryant, and a Department store. I do not bother with looking in Victoria Secrets, because your stores does not cater to plus size women. I don't know why, its seems like you would want to cater to that market, you know because of the whole plus size movement.

Patty's response to me was, and I am paraphrasing here "we do cater to the plus size women, you might not know that, but we do. We are trying our best to pull in those plus size shoppers. We even offer free bras to mothers on Mother's Day."

Because I do not shop at Victoria Secrets. I had to go home and do a little more research. I dug deep, and by digging deep I mean I pulled up their website and search under "Bras"lol.

Here are my findings, the largest bra that Victoria Secret offers is a 38 DDD. Yes, this is considered plus size, but what about me? The 44 DDD girls! We plus size girls would like to look sexy. We plus girls want to go skipping done the mall corridor swinging our pink Victoria Secrets bags. Please try harder to cater to us.

I don't know what made her wander over to my table, but hopelly my voice was heard, and later she will wander across this post, and take notice. Hopefully this doesn't just fall on deaf ears. So maybe one day in the near future I will be sitting at a table alone, and sale rep from Victoria Secrets wonders up to my table. And when asked the question "Do you shop at Victoria Secrets?" My answer will be "Why yes I do!"

Can I Get a Two Piece Please???

My love for a two piece set has not wavered. They're so versatile and easy to wear, and when I shop thats what I am looking for. My life is complicated enough (I'll save that for another post lol), so my waredrobe cannot further complicate my life.  This particular piece can make at least 2 more outfits. Again, your waredrobe will thank me.

Side note: Don't count out stores that only offer straight sizes. This particular set is from New York and Company, a store I had wrote off, because I am plus size. NY&co goes up to a XL, and I'm typically a 2x-3x. but, lately I have been found some nice pieces, because alot of their pieces offer stretch, and in the plus size world stretch i bea lol.

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What's Your Fresh?? Featuring DeShawn A.

Style Spotlight: Deshawn

Occupation: TV Director 

Location: Palm Springs, CA

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The Undercover Fashionista: So DeShawn, what kind of fit makes you feel good?

Deshawn: Comfort makes me feel good..When I am able to turn comfortable clothes into a fashion paradise, I won. 

The Undercover Fashionista: describe your perfect outfit 

Deshawn: Nice fresh fedora, a pair of distressed jeans, white v-neck, and some exclusive vans.

The Undercover Fashionista: Oh I see you, true Cali Style, I like. Well I'll let you take it from here, and describe to our readers what you are wearing in the pictures below, where you wore them to to and motivation behind your choices

Whats sup everybody.. This 1st look I was inspired by the city of Miami.. White, slim pants from HandM with a mint button-down.. And i went sock less to really get that Miami vibe type feel with the tan loafers made by Stacee Adams..

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This was a rushed birthday pic of mine.. Slim faded washed blue jeans.. And strawberry denim blazer and some very unique Jeremy Scott Adidas. And to top off this fit was my favorite blue berry fedora hat... With a simple white v-neck tee.. I went for the 'its my birthday, I can dress myself if I wanna'  look.

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Went to a wedding. They said you don't suppose to out dress the bride and groom... Welp.. Mybad lol...  Royal blue Chino pants with a checkered button down and the blue berry fedora again making the outfit swaggerific... Shoes was peanut butter loafers..

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Christmas party 2014 2 years ago.. The infamous blazer... Its a Paisley, turquoise and brown blazer.. My aunt got it for me for a birthday gift... SWAGGIN! white distressed jeans and brown dress shoes.. Enough SAID LOL

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Well there you go guys, Deshawn, one of the flyest guys I know explaining his "Fresh" - Simple, Grown, and Sleek.

Stay tune for next months style spotlight.

Who The Eff Are You To Tell Me......

 Ashley Graham on the cover of Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Edition 

Ashley Graham on the cover of Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Edition 

 "I would have sex with her, but I would never date her."

"That’s great, but if you are plus-sized, maybe you should stay in your lane."  

Those were just a few comments I heard from men after Ashley Graham's Sports Illustrated Swimsuit cover was released.

Listening made me wonder. "Is this how men feel about me? Am I not dateable? Am I wrong for showing women it’s okay to go against what society deems acceptable? Should I just stay in my lane?"

My response? "Get the fuck out of here with that self-doubt bullshit. You are on the right track. Those comments are why you are on this path--you are showing women how to feel beautiful and not internalize others’ opinions of their bodies."

So let’s break down some of the comments I mentioned above."I wouldn't date her.” Men have a weird way of thinking they're always the choosers; saying “I wouldn’t date her” as if she’d actually consider dating them. Men assume plus-sized women are desperate. Not the case.

"She should stay in her lane.” She was doing so good in "her lane" that Sports Illustrated asked her to cross into their lane. Because someone is plus-sized, they shouldn’t want to be seen as sexy? I’ll wait.

This week has shown me how much I have grown. The old me would have wrestled with everyone else’s thoughts for weeks and used them as an excuse to doubt myself. New me took in what was said and after realizing I didn’t agree, dismissed it. That’s definitely growth. I'll take it.

Are you having a hard time overcoming others’ opinions? How do you deal with it?

 

What are your effing thoughts on this topic???

Valentine's Day Look #2

I love this dress, and I had some much fun wearing this dress around town yesterday. Even though this dress is so simple, it made me feel so womanly. I don't know if it was the red paired with leopard print wedges, the way it hugged my body, the slits in up the side, or the fact that it was sexy without being overly sexy - may be it was all four reasons.

This Valentine's look has a modest neck and hem line, which makes this look perfect for the women who don't like to show much skin.

Styling tip: not pictured, but I paired this dress with a black leather jacket with gold details. Also, this dress could be paired with a blazer or trench coat.

Dress: Boohoo.com  

Heels: Journey's  

 

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Valentine's Day Look #1 (deleted)

Roses are red, violets are blue, I typically hate pink, but with a touch of leather it will do.

I am dedicating this post to the edgy girly girls, who are currently looking for a dress to wear on Valentine's Day.

I purchased this dress from Charlotte Russe and paired it with a pink leather jacket from Torrid to edge it out a bit.

Let me know what your thoughts are, is this something you would wear?

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What's Your Fresh Robyn Louis from the Blog The Skinny Black Girl??

My Style: Robyn Louis of theskinnyblackgirl.com

 

I was five years old when En Vogue dropped the video to their debut single, “Hold On” and shaped what would become my adult style. Womanhood was a little black dress, black pumps, and a bold red lip. I couldn’t wait to grow up.

 

At thirty-two, I still aim for En Vogue when dressing for a night out. Little Black Dress. Black pumps. Red lips. Other influences have crept in over the years that inform my day-to-day style: Toni Braxton’s short hair (which I made my signature cut this year); the French approach to building on basics (black, white, navy, grey, stripes, the occasional “pop” of color); and a hint of tomboy (I live for a white T-shirt and a good pair of Nikes).

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One of my mantras is “I hate stuff.” Clutter drives me insane; as does having too many options. I started researching minimalism two years ago and was fascinated with the idea of a wardrobe I wouldn’t have to think about. I worried initially about looking “plain” or “boring,” but I realized I have a pretty big personality and adopting a simple, signature look allows that personality to shine through. While my clothes are pretty basic, I play around with textured and patterned stockings and tights. I also love the occasional ruby red or cobalt blue dress when I want to turn heads.

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My go-to outfit? I’m a fan of the blazer, white T-shirt, and leggings combination.

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My dream piece? A white cashmere winter coat. 

Robyn Louis is a thirtysomething blogger hailing from Cleveland, Ohio. An MFA dropout, writer by calling and a wise ass by craft, she posts her tales, interests, and observations on her award-winning personal blog, The Skinny Black Girl.


My Thighs Thank Lane Bryant

It was the summer of 1994 and all I wanted to do was watch Pretty Woman, starring Julia Roberts, over and over. And I did.

Obsessed over the opening scene where Vivian is getting dressed (Yes, the scene were she is zipping up her patent leather thigh high boots) I remember thinking those boots are so were sexy, and I had to get a pair when I grew up.

Fast forward to me as an adult, blessed with thick calves and thighs, this task was quite difficult. Until I stumbled across these Lane Bryant wide leg thigh high boots on Naturally Fashionable's blog page. I ordered them and they fit perfectly.

So readers, if you are like myself and your legs are wider than most, I encourage you to check these boots on Lane Bryant's website. And to Lane Bryant, thanks for allowing me a chance to live out my Pretty Woman fantasy. 

The Great Wardrobe Escape

Every now and then I will purchase a retro- style dress, like the one featured here, just so I can imagine myself in that particular decade.  

Where has my imagination taken me today in this 50's inspired dress from Charlotte Russe? Well today, I am standing on a platform at a smoked filled train station passionately kissing my guy as we say our tearful goodbyes, because his draft card was pulled and he's off to war.

The world can be so upsetting at times, and one can become overwhelmed with their day to day routine. So, I say mentally escape, slip on an outfit and become someone that you always wanted to be. But here's the catch, you have to come back. I promise you'll have fun.

Until next time, stay fly.

More Bang for Your Buck!!!

 Outfit:  Ava and Viv @ Target

Outfit:  Ava and Viv @ Target

I am typically a dress, romper and jumper type of girl, but recently I tried my hand at purchasing two piece outfits, and I must say,"I officially love them!!!!"

Now don't get me wrong, I will always love my one piece outfits due to their convenience. However, separate pieces have given me what my wardrobe needs and that is options.

 

By buying pieces that can be mixed and matched, it allows you to stretch the items in your wardrobe a little further. Take, for instance, this Ava and Viv two pieces set plus this tee shirt I bought from Target; these 3 separate pieces allowed me to create 6 different outfit options by pairingthem with items I already own.

 

So, next time when you are in a shopping mood I encourage you to avoid the one pieces for now, and reach for those separates.  I promise your closet and wallet will thank you, mine sure did!!!!!!


Check out how I paired these items and until next time stay fly.













Charlotte Russe Lookbook

If you are anything like me, you love a good sale. Recently I was on Charlotte Russe's website, and stubbled across their Labor Day sale. All dresses were marked down to 20 dollars, and of course I had to pick me up a few.

 

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The first dress I picked up was this flirty pink lace dress with flower details. I am in love with this dress, as you can probably tell from the pictures below. This dress is perfect for a date night with that special someone or a night out with your girls. 

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The second dress I purchased was this brown and gold one. I know I will get a lot of wear out of all of these dresses, but I feel like this dress will be in heavy rotation. 

The third dress has actually already been worn. I wore this dress to a recent picnic and it was so comfortable, and it hid the bloat us ladies get after eating.

Last, but certainly not least is this lace dress I purchased. Although this isn't my favorite dress, it is still a much needed piece in my wardrobe. If ever I get a chance to take a vacation, I will definetly be sure to pack this dress in my suitcase. 

**excuse the wrinkles in a few of the dresses - I was trying to get pictures of the dresses, and a post up before the dresses were sold out - I will do better next time.**

 

 

 

 

 

What I Am Here For...

I felt the need to address the following. My apologies if it sounds repetitive.

The other day, I came across a video on Facebook of a woman discussing "fat shaming". I clicked on it, thinking the video had a positive message. Wrong. What I saw was hate. To sum it up, she said it’s not okay to be fat. She went on to say more hurtful things, that I may discuss in another blog, but for now I want to focus on "it’s not ok to be fat.”

When I heard her say "it’s not ok to be fat" I thought about the message of this blog and felt led to explain what I’m about as "a plus size blogger."

This blog was created to help inspire, encourage, and motivate people to accept themselves as they are right now, while they work to become who they aspire to be. I do so by showing you my journey. The one thing I am learning to accept so I can change is my body. A body that happens to be obese at the present time.

I do not “promote obesity.” However, it is always okay embrace and adorn yourself as you are--no matter where you are in your life or health journey. 

What is this blog promoting? Love; it’s just that simple. Love yourself, so you can love others; whether you are a size 2 or a size 22. 


Until next time, stay fly.


Laced in Confidence

The dress is from Forever 21 Plus, the swimsuit top is from Monif C, and the swimsuit bottoms are from Sammydress.

Now let’s talk about what it took for me to take this picture. I kept going back and forth on taking a risk and showcasing this beautiful lace maxi with a swimsuit; or playing it safe and wearing a slim fitted dress.

I thought about the way I lived my life in the past--always playing it safe--whether it be in my career, my love life, or my finances. This was mainly due to a lack of confidence in my ability to do great things. Over the years, however, I have been slowly building up my confidence. So, I would be doing myself a disservice if I opted for the fitted dress, right? Right!

After taking the picture, I thought I was hot stuff and strutted around for a bit before hopping back into jeans and a simple tee. BUT my point is I took a risk. That’s what I wanted to show you guys: how to be bold while facing your struggles.

As I write this post, I am reminded of a quote by Joe Namath: "When you have confidence, you can have a lot of fun. And when you have fun, you can do amazing things." I am so ready to start doing amazing things, starting by being Laced in Confidence.

Until next time, stay fly.

 

My Skinny Friends

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I was having drinks with one of my best girlfriends recently and the topic of “plus size girls with skinny friends” came up. 


I told her about a recent conversation I had with Kim, a fellow plus size girl, about being the biggest girl in her circle of friends and the added pressure that comes with having to look extra good around them. Being the biggest of all my friends, I could relate to her frustrations. 

This was a big issue for me in college and post-graduation. I missed milestone events in my friends’ lives because of it. “However,” I told Kim, “I eventually got past it because I realized the only person thinking about me being ‘the plus size friend’ and them being ‘the skinny friends’ was me. In the end, they won't remember what you were wearing that night that y’all had a blast. All they will remember was that you were there.”

If your friends cared only about how their clique is perceived, they wouldn’t hang out with you. Trust me, there are definitely girls out there who pick their friends based solely on appearance. People (who are not my friends) have suggested I get bigger friends because I seem “out of place.” But if your friends are begging you to be part of their adventures, they are not those type of girls. 

So please stop comparing yourself to your skinny friends. You will not look like them (right now) in a two piece swimsuit. You don’t look like them in a dress or jeans or skirt and that’s fine because on the flip side they don’t look like you. You can only control how you feel about you and that the clothes you pick suit your style and body type so when it’s time to hang out, you feel confident about looking fabulous with your fabulous friends.  

As my friend and I finished up our drinks she asked “Did someone really say you should pick bigger friends?" When I replied yes, she asked “Well hell, you’re supposed to hang out with a group of big girls just because they are big and be miserable? That’s dumb as f--k.” I always knew I had good friends but when she spoke those words she solidified she wasn’t the kind of girl who picked her friends based solely on how they look. I took her message to mean “I’m your friend. Period.” 


 

Crop It Out

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I have come across quite a few plus size bloggers exclaiming how freeing it is to wear a crop top, and the fact that you are plus size should not stop you from buying one.

Me, in a crop top? Outside of my home? Never! Could I? It couldn't hurt to try, right? Isn't that what this blog is about? Trying new things and stepping outside your comfort zone? Why yes, yes it is.

So I did my research and learned that the best crop tops to wear are the ones that stop about two inches below your breast, and they are most flattering when paired with a high-waisted bottom that comes up right above your natural waist. 

I love this crop top that I am wearing from Torrid. It’s lightweight and doesn’t cling to my body. I paired the top with a high waisted skirt (also from Torrid) that features ruching to camouflage troubling areas, and a slit for added sex appeal.

I must say this was a freeing experience. Feeling the breeze hit your exposed midriff as a plus size girl is one of the best feelings in the world. Try it, and let me know how it goes. If you’ve tried it already, did you like it? Would you wear a crop top again?

Plays, Plays and Plays

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Lately, I have been attending a lot of stage plays, mainly because it is one of my favorite things to do. When I attend these plays, I love to get dressed up to the nine and feel sophisticated.  

The dress I am wearing tonight, while seeing The Wiz, is from Old Navy. It features a nice flower detail, perfect for spring, and will be paired with shoes from JC Penney, that I scored for 5 bucks. My accessories will be minimal tonight; just some cute bangles, because I wanted to let the dress be center stage. See below for pictures.

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Anchors over the years have been a symbol of security, stability, being grounded and strength as they hold down ships even in the stormiest of weather. 

If and when you run into me, I always have on something with an anchor or it; earrings, a necklace, a bracelet, or just the tattoo on my forearm, shined up peeking out of the rolled up sleeve of my cardigan. If I’m having a bad day, I look down at that anchor and remind myself of all the things stated above that reside in me.

That’s what your clothes should do: (outside of a higher power) bring some type of peace to your life. Whether it’s a crease in your pants that reminds you it’s okay to be straight-laced, the little wrinkles you haphazardly leave in your shirt as a reminder not to take life too seriously, or a kooky pair of socks you put on to make others laugh. 

If you don’t have pieces that bring you peace or happiness, I suggest you reflect on your wardrobe until you find it. It may be a superstition of mine or a crutch (like a child's security blanket) but I believe that your clothing is more powerful than you know. Choose wisely.

Shop Your Closet Update..

This post will be sweet and to the point. Just want to show you the outfits I came up with during "Shop Your Closet” week. I learned a lot about myself while picking out my clothes each day. Here are some of my observations: 

I really like black
I need to incorporate more color into my wardrobe
I dig no-fuss clothing
I look great in jeans

Going into this project, I figured it was a good way to look great without spending any money. And I knew it would teach me how to work with what I’ve got and be grateful for what I have. Those lessons were much-needed, but this challenge also helped me become a more focused and conscious shopper. Knowing what you like and don't like, you avoid buying items that will sit in your closet, with you rifling past them saying “Why did I buy this.” Trust me, your pockets will thank you.

I know a lot of you didn’t participate this week, but I challenge you do so next month. Shop Your Closet was a terrific experience for me and I would love to share it with you all.

So long until next time... 

Shop Your Closet

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“I have nothing to wear" is probably the most common phrase uttered by men and women. This phrase transcends generations, gender, race, and social classes. It’s usually followed by the person staring at their closet as if their clothes have failed them horribly. Then comes a complete loss of hope and the inevitable trip to the mall

I’ve played the “nothing to wear” game on many occasions, but recently one of my wise friends overheard me and replied "take a look at your closet, but do it with the mindset that you have absolutely no money to buy new clothes, and watch the ideas you come up with.” Of course I walked away thinking "She has no clue what she is talking about. This will never work.” However, she was correct. As I stood there ideas started to flow and I began thinking “this can go with that, that can go with this.” In no time I HAD SOMETHING TO WEAR.

So I have decided to make a segment for the blog called "Shop Your Closet" and I hope you will join me. We can look at our closets in a new way, and also give me a chance to interact with you guys. If you are like me, you don't have a ton of money to spend on clothes, but still you want to look nice.

Here's how it works: I will post looks I have put together using the items in my closet (I will not go out and purchase anything new for this segment to complete the look). I will post these looks to my blog every third Saturday of the month. We will start this month’s post on April 18th. 

Want to join the fun? Upload your looks online and mention me (Facebook: Marcia Craggett or Instagram: ms_fash) to show off what outfits you put together. I can’t wait to see your looks!